How to Detox from Social Media and Why

I am two weeks social media free!
Where is my chip? Where is the support group and free cookie? Wait-this isn’t a meeting for Social Media Addicts Anonymous? Oh. Oh well! I am relieved to make it this far. I am three weeks without Instagram and Snapchat. I am two weeks without Facebook. My detox started as a solution to anxiety, which spiked the week before my first exam in my masters program. The stress of an upcoming test had me subconsciously checking Facebook more obsessively than usual.

I signed out of my accounts. I deleted the applications. I vowed to spend my time focusing on school or engaging in something real. Things like studying, reading, socializing in person, etc. Last week I aced my midterms. I have read, from start to finish, 2 books. I responded to every text message from friends, family and strangers. I made my bed everyday. I stayed committed to my fitness regimen. I reply to e-mails. I take 5 minutes to meditate every day. I mailed two packages that were supposed to be sent during Christmas. I am discovering that I have plenty of time for those things I thought I was too busy for.

I confess that I still have inklings to type ‘’. But I don’t miss anything about it. I thought I would miss seeing updates from my close friends and family who live out of state. But instead, when my friend is telling me about her weekend, I tell her to send me pictures. It’s ten times more gratifying this way.

I thought Facebook was a source for inspirational articles. Between my kindle and theory textbooks, I am in no short supply of inspiration these days. I am less vulnerable to fake news. I stay up to date by reading the Associated Press and I form my own opinion. I’m no longer irked by my high school cohort who have yet to leave town. Nor am I bombarded with advertisements that convince me I need more to be happy.

One concern about the overuse of online social media is that it reduces the quality of in person socializing. Think of the times you go to a friends apartment before a night out, and look around and see eyes glued to cell phones. I call that low quality socializing. Researchers are finding that multitasking with social media is a risk factor for social anxiety and depression  (Beck,Stephenson J. 2017). Flipping between Twitter and Facebook then watching a video on Youtube may be putting you at risk too.

I don’t see a reason to go back. I am enjoying my detox and eager to see how far it takes me.

Here is a quick guide to detoxing from Social Media:

Step 1: On Facebook, go to Settings -> security -> deactivate.
Note: if you link your Spotify account to FB, you will have to log back in. My work-around is to log off immediately, delete the bookmark, and with super human strength avoid typing the website URL.

Step 2: Delete instagram, snapchat, twitter or anything absorbing your free time.
This frees your time AND your phone space!

Step 3: Engage with others
Meet up with friends; in my case weekly study dates with one of my best friends. I planned a trip to see another best friend who lives out of state.
Meet up with family; I bought tickets to a basketball game for a double date with my brother. I’ve never been, and now that I am social media free, it seems that I have more time I guess!

Step 4: Engage with self
Write, read, exercise, cook, revisit old hobbies. This is my favorite part.

And never look back. Except to remind yourself how good it feels to be social media free.


Beck, S. J., Paskewitz, E. A., Anderson, W. A., Bourdeaux, R., & Currie-Mueller, J. (2017). The task and relational dimensions of online social support. Health Communication, 32(3), 347-355. doi:10.1080/10410236.2016.1138383


Flow Searching: A Concept in Mindfulness

Scrolling through the digital kindle store, I picked the book titled ‘The Happiness Hypothesis’. A book that links ancient philosophy with contemporary psychology. At the time, I wasn’t searching for the key to happiness. Or maybe I was. But any topic on well-being is an immediate interest of mine.

What stuck with me was the concept of ‘Flow’. Flow is when you are immersed in a skill. In other words, you are “in the zone”. A skillful activity could be a hobby, craft, art, or chores. Anything. When people ‘flow’, they are engaged.

It is no surprise that ‘flow’ is associated with happiness. Being engaged is synonymous to mindfulness. Now imagine being mindful while accomplishing something skillful. Mindflow, if you will- a dopamine explosion occurs. The mind craves these experiences.
Since learning about flow, I have been on a hunt for my dopamine trigger. When am I immersed in something skillful? This started my journey into flow searching (the new soul searching). I traced recent memories to think of a time which I felt happy and challenged. The first thing that came to mind was the same reason I started this blog.

It starts out how most blogs begin. I felt drained at my job. I dreaded going to work. I wondered if it was a phase, or time for a new job. But then, like the sun breaking through the clouds, I was enlightened. I stepped out of my patients room as I usually do. But this time, I felt refreshed. I felt content in my career choice. All I did was teach a young man about his new type 1 diabetes. I talked to him and his parents for an hour, answering their questions with precision. I was confident. I felt knowledgeable. In the end, my patient did too. I discovered my Flow before I had known what flow was. I was engaged again and reminded of my love for nursing.

That is why I am here. Patient teaching is my flow. I am flow searching through writing. Even just writing this article has my dopamine receptors tingling. My flow searching journey continues as I develop my blog further, connect with the community and teach others.

Why is Hospice Taboo?

When patients or family hear the word ‘hospice’, it triggers a cascade of defense mechanisms. What they know is that Hospice provides symptom management for the last 6 months of life. What they may not know is that Hospice is a wholistic service with your loved one at the center. As a health care provider, I realize there is a taboo surrounding the word hospice. I want to clarify what hospice is, and why it should be presented to everyone with a terminal diagnosis as an option.
Hospice, by definition according to merriam-webster is “a program designed to provide palliative care and emotional support to the terminally ill in a home or homelike setting so that quality of life is maintained and family members may be active participants in care; also : a facility that provides such a program”
Yet, without knowing the definition of Palliative Care, this may be confusing. Palliation is the relief of symptoms. With terminal illnesses, people often have many uncomfortable symptoms. These symptoms are what lead people to seek medical treatment. They can be pain, nausea, vomiting, constipation, or even a lack of appetite. In hospice, the primary goal is to make the person comfortable, always. This is done by alleviating of the symptoms through medicines (even unconventional medicines) and alternate therapies. Hospice also addresses the emotional aspect of it. Whether that be through a chaplain, a counselor or an empathetic nurse. Many times, the hospice provider will follow up with your family for years to come.
What is most important is that the person receiving hospice care is in control of their care. Meaning, if the person wants to eat salty french fries even though they have high blood pressure, that is ok! If they are weak but want to get up, let them! If they want to live on a diet of sweets, even though they have diabetes, that is ok too! Or, if they want to continue living on a diabetic diet, that is fine too. The emphasis is on quality of their days left. Quantity, is something that is never guaranteed. No healthcare provider can predict how many days a person has left. But a person, with the support of a hospice team, can determine the quality of life on a day to day basis.

Hospice is not taboo, it is a gift.

It hurts finding out that you or your loved one have limited time left on this earth. It is a bitter pill to swallow. The next step is to find out how you can maximize the time that is left. Time is unpredictable, but you can make the most of it with Hospice. Hospice is not taboo, it is a gift. Everyone with a terminal illness should consider it as a treatment option. It is not giving up, it is maximizing the time left.


Is My Fitness Routine Enough?

The fitness googling binge: searching fitness routines for hours endlessly until we find ourselves deep in the internet without ever finding the answers we need. We started off with “How to be healthy” and ended up on a blog that sucks you into buying their PDF fitness routine with false claims.

This is a battle that I, my friends, family and patients cycle through often. We feel like our fitness routine is not enough. We are not losing enough. We are not moving enough. We start one plan, stick with it for a few days, fall off and feel guilty. Back to googling.

Perhaps we do not stick to a fitness plan because it is actually too much. It makes our bodies tired. It’s difficult to incorperate into our daily lives. We blame ourselves, but I think it is important to look at what is enough?

Currently, many organizations like the American Cancer Society and the American Heart Association are in agreement. Enough exercise can be 150 minutes of ‘moderate exercise’ per week, or 75 minutes of ‘vigorous exercise’ per week. Let’s break this down.

  • 150 Minutes of Moderate Intensity Exercise

150 minutes over a course of seven days could be roughly 20 minutes per day. Or, 30 minutes Monday through Friday. Or, three 50 minute moderate exercises in a week.

Do these numbers seem more manageable? Let’s explore what ‘moderate intensity’ means.

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), examples include:

  1. Brisk walking, walking domestic animals
  2. Dancing
  3. Gardening
  4. Housework like chores or painting

Anything that has your heart at an increased rate could be included. Things like yoga, playing at the park with your child, or walking fast to catch your bus can elevate your heart rate.

  • 75 Minutes of Vigorous Intensity

In a seven day period, this could be 3 days of 25 minute exercises. Or, even 5 days of 15 minutes vigorous exercise. Maybe you do a spin class for 60 minutes one day a week, and a 15 minute HIIT workout two days later. You are meeting your quota!

Our experts at WHO define Vigorous intensity as:

  1. Running
  2. Cycling
  3. Fast swimming
  4. Competitive Sports

My message is this: You are doing enough!  If you missed a workout, but are still walking to work everyday, it is okay! If you meet these guidelines, you are on track to a healthy life. At a minimum, I know that I am taking my dog for a walk about 20 minutes everyday, and sometimes twice a day. This reinforces to me that even if I skip out on a gym session, I am still doing enough to maintain a healthy life. For the less leisurely, or those who enjoy a good sweat but maybe not everyday, you are probably doing enough too. Cut yourself some slack, and celebrate that you are active after all.

For those who are trying to achieve their ideal body, perhaps this is not enough. But for my patients and myself, I am most concerned about living a long healthy life. Examine your goals, and celebrate your accomplishments.

Disclaimer: let’s not forget that a healthy lifestyle is coupled with eating right too. Exercise alone is not enough. More to come on eating right in the future.

Did you notice that your daily routine may be enough to live a healthy life? Tell me about it in the comments!



What to Say When Someone Has Cancer

The ‘C’ Word. When you hear it for the first time it kinda feels like a bomb dropping on your heart. It devastates your mind. It renders you speechless. Cancer sucks. With cancer on the rise, caregivers and support teams alike need to be ready to respond. I speak from experience, not just as a nurse, but as a caregiver too. I remember telling my best friend at the age of 15 about my Dad’s cancer diagnosis. It was early in the morning and I met her at our shared locker just like any other school day. As soon as she saw me, it was clear something was wrong. My head down, hair disheveled. It was definitely a sweatpants day. The word ‘cancer’ was barely audible between my sobs. Her response was perfect. She hugged me immediately, and shuffled us to the nearest bathroom for privacy. We had a moment of silence. Finally she said “We are going to get through this – Papa Gleason is going to get through this”. I liked what she said because she said we; meaning I did not have to go through this alone. It was clear that she meant what she said, and looking back years later she stuck to her word.

Whatever you do say, say it from the heart. Say it like you mean it. I remember a teammate had said to me “Oh, okay sorry”. Her delivery sounded like she was minimizing the situation.  Sometimes, we just want to be acknowledged for the severity of what it is.

Start with this:

  • “I am so sorry”

Follow with this:

  • “I want you to know I am here for you, now and whenever you need me”
  • “How are you doing?” then “How is your family doing?”
  • “I do not know what to say, just know that I care [for you or your family]
  • “What can I do to make this a little easier on you?”
    • “Can I bring you dinner next Wednesday?”
    • “How about I let your dog out when you are at treatment”
    • “Do you need a ride at all?”

So long as you are genuine and show your support, your cannot go wrong. Unless you say the following:

  • “I know how you feel” – it’s likely that you do not.
  • “I understand” – you probably don’t
  • “That sucks” – cancer does suck, but your friend or family needs support, not additional negativity

What have you said in the past?


Welcome to the coffee break clinic!

Last week, I spent an hour in my patients room, speaking to him and his family about chemotherapy and how it works. To watch the look of fear transform to the look of empowerment was energizing. I too stepped out of that room refreshed. It was a reminder of why I became a nurse in the first place: patient education! I am here to expand my reach, to provide quality information based on the literature in a way that is easy to understand. I am an oncology nurse, and a nurse practitioner in training. I specialize in primary care, adult gerontology, and oncology. I care deeply about people and am here to share my passion through writing.

Here is what you can expect from me:

  • posts supported by evidence in the literature
  • topics relevant to health, well-being and prevention
  • support where ever you are in your health journey

Above all, I am putting myself out there to get to know others in the health and wellness community. Survivors, caregivers, health care providers, or hobbyists – I want to meet you!

Do you have any topics of interest? I have hundreds of ideas but am open to answering questions too!